Regarding the issue in the previous post, I guess it kind of got resolved.....for now.

I pray that God will be with me as I, for ONCE in my life, attempt with everything in my human power, along with His support, to live as He would want me to live.  No more hypocritical living if I can help it.

There is this guy in my small group who wants me to take a creative writing class with him at the local community college this summer.  Hm....good idea?  I just don't think the teacher has ever seen anything quite like MY stories, haha!

             "Another Moral Dilemma for BFK"

Say that a girl (we'll call her Psycho Girl) who lives far away from northern Virginia - she actually lives in a city that has no Koreans - sometimes attends your church because she is friends with one of the girls there.  Say that you and the Psycho Girl talked for a bit.....and say she sticks a knife in your back and you don't know why.  Say it was totally uncalled for and made no logical sense at all.

Then say her female friend at your church LOVES to play matchmaker all the time.  Say her friend tries to set up Psycho Girl with one of your closer male friends and confidantes at the church (and the church's most eligible bachelor).  Say that you figure out that Pyscho Girl likes your friend for marriage purposes.  The question is, does your friend feel the same way about her?  The answer COULD be yes.

Say that Psycho Girl has driven several hours to come to northern Virginia this past weekend (because she was in town to meet the church's Most Eligible Bachelor in a group gathering Saturday night per the machinations of her friend, the busybody matchmaker).  On Sunday morning, she visits your church and gives off clear body language that she wants there to be peace with you...only you won't give her the opportunity to speak with you because you are still understandably irritated by that past backstabbing that really crossed the line.  Say also that you figure she is likely wanting to be conciliatory and apologetic to you, not only because she knows that she was in the wrong...but that you, alias BFK, are now in the awkward, but somewhat satisfying, position of being able to tell your friend, the Most Eligible Bachelor, about the backstabbing and thus ruin her chance at future happiness.  Everyone knows that every Korean-American knows every other Korean-American living in the same geographic area....but she likely did not imagine, due to the fact that she lives so far away from the northern VA. area in an area with almost no Koreans, that in such a large church that the guy known as BFK and the guy known as the church's Most Eligible Bachelor were good friends and confidants.

Say that now the guy known as BFK has a decision to make:  Should he tell his friend about the previous backstabbing by the Psycho Girl?  He knows that his good friend, the church's Most Eligible Bachelor, could very well otherwise end up married to the Psycho Girl (who really isn't that bad a girl, despite her flaws like the occasional backstab which is SOOOOO unnecessary).  He knows that both he AND she are good Christian, conservative folk....except for her onetime snobby backstabbing of the guy known as BFK.  And he knows that if he told his friend everything about the previous backstabbing drama involving the Psycho Girl that the church's Most Eligible Bachelor likely would keep a distance from Psycho Girl since they have only just recently gotten acquainted.

But would the guy known as BFK be sharing this information with the church's Most Eligible Bachelor because he cares about his friend?  or would he do it because he is still p*ssed with the Psycho Girl?  And is he better off NOT saying anything to his friend about it?

That is the moral dilemma that must be decided by this coming Wednesday when the BFK and his friend, the church's Most Eligible Bachelor, meet.

But also noteworthy about this story is the moral lesson taught:  What goes around comes around.  Be careful who you backstab because later they are either in a position to help you....or hurt you.

Okay, the boomers (those born between 1946-1964) had their hurrah.  And even though the Generation Y-ers (those born between 1976-1986, though some say the range is 1980-1986) are aging themselves, I declare this upcoming summer of 2008 to be......

                                   "The Summer of Generation X"

Were you born between, and including, the years 1965 and 1975 (though some say 1980)?  Then you are a Generation X-er.  I won't go into all the stuff from VH1's "I love the 80s" to overnostalgicize our childhood, like the Rubik's Cube, the Trapper Keeper notebook, or the Atari Video Game System.  No, this is essay is more about the here and now.

I have one or two friends from high school coming to DC - separately, and we may hang out together.  Both are married and have children.  Both seem to sort of envy me and my lifestyle (they know I meet a lot of women and keep myself fit by running a lot, unlike most of my classmates with 40" waists and bald heads).  Needless to say, I envy them for the some of the things I do not have.

So we'll hang.

There will be a lot of talking.  A lot of reminiscing.  And a lot of......good times!

I guess we'll be living life like the so-called Frat Pack.  You know, Jack Black, Will Ferrell, Ben Stiller, Vince Vaughn, and brothers Luke Wilson and Owen Wilson, and Steve Carell who are always playing aging Generation X-er men who party like they're in college and who hook up with young girls in their early twenties.  It's the ultimate fantasy of BFK!

Throw in a little bit of Ferris Bueller's Day Off mentality of "Life moves pretty fast; you don't stop and look around once in a while it could pass you by" to guide us.....

Fueled by some music from the Go-Gos, Simple Minds, and Run-DMC.....

Factor in a little soon-to-be mid-life crisis.....

and watch the fireworks!

I just wonder if this summer will be any different from any of the other summers and if it's worth going all out like that.  It would be nice to have a happy end for once.

                      "Resolution of Previous Angry Entry"

             Rosie:  "She was never a friend to start with"

             BFK:   "?? "

             Rosie:  "because if she was....she woulda been there for u"

             BFK:  "but does it sound like I got seriously let down?"

             Rosie:   "yep.  i wouldn't even acknowledge her anymore"

             Rosie (regarding one of the several reasons why I got pissed with this former friend):  "tell her how illogical it is that she goes to someone else's [event] which is minutes from yours yet tells you that it's too far for her to go to yours.  It's just flippant of her to say that she'd go with you, then do a "no show" but then go to another outing with someone else within the same vicinity.  Anyway.  Whatever let her go on with her life.  If she didn't want to go, she should have been straightforward and told you instead of giving you false hope that she would be attending the function with you.  Don't say you're going to do something and not do it."

Agreed, Rosie.  Agreed.

Feeling a LOT better now.

Okay, I'm in a really irritated mood right now about many things.  So hence I am feeling REALLY immature now.  Now on to today's entry!

                             "BFK's Online Hit List"

Okay, it's CLEAN-UP TIME!!!!!!!!

1.  I won't say names, but to one person, I got this to say:  Do you think you can snub me (yet again) for my b-day dinner despite my text message and IM invitations to you, without saying either a yes or no.....and then wish me a happy birthday on my Xanga blog (on my last entry)....and think I'm okay with you're not having responded (in either a "yes" or "no thanks" response) to my previous invites?  You were labelled as "unreliable" by me and another friend in the past (for good reason)....but damn, I am disappointed with you with you're not even RESPONDING to my recent invite; I understand people can't make dinners (even birthday dinners)....but you didn't even respond with a polite rejection to my repeated invites.  So if my bad mood persists, you are OFF the subs. list tonight....and out of my life.

2.  To another xanga person (in NJ) who I happened to see at the Cafe' Asia in Arlington, VA and who used to subscribe to me: As I mentioned to you in Xanga Private Message, yes, we do know some of the same people (since every Korean knows every other Korean in VA...and in NY)....but if you're gonna put up a Friends Lock on your xanga blog and refuse to include me, I don't see why I should answer your question as to who all the people are that I know that know you (even though you keep asking me).  And apparently, you need to be watching your behavior and your TEMPER from what they tell me, Miss Uptight!  And yes, I swore them to secrecy that they know me.  But yeah, I DO know a lot of people, a few of who know you.  Only you'll never know who they are....or what they say about you.  Why should I share that info with you?  They're my friends.

BTW, your bf's quite the midget, isn't he?  Good match for you.

And more coming....  Damn, I'm in a p*ssed off mood today.

I got a lot of stress on my mind these days.

But somehow despite all the personal stress, I still had a festive dinner with lots of well-wishing friends gathering together on Sunday (with people from two churches, one girl I met at Tysons Corner Mall a few months ago, and even one or two xanga friends).

And now I will go to see my parents on this very day that I am taking off from work....my actual birthday.

So not to sound egotistical, folks, but GIVE ME SOME BIRTHDAY LOVE!

          "BFK's Last and Greatest 10-Mile Race EVER"

All done.  1 hour, 24 minutes.  And I'm almost crippled now in my right knee.

But I did it!  And at an even a faster pace than what I did it in 2003, my best year.

Why do we do these things to our body for the sake of ego.......

As for the NCAA Basketball Championship:  Go Jayhawks!!!!!!

                          "Preparing for the Race"

So Sunday is the 10-mile race.  It's also close to my birthday.

One thing, though, I've discovered while training for this race:  I have gained a lot of weight since beginning training a few months back....as in FAT.  I have been developing a gut.  And I don't think I eat THAT much fatty stuff.

Ironically, my running has gotten better and better.

Can't wait for this race to end....then I can settle for just running 3 or 4 miles every other day rather than 8, 9, or 10 on the weekend, resulting in me having to rest three days to recover (and thus gain more weight).

But come Sunday.....

I am sooooo gonna kick *ss.