February 22, 2008

• Reporter in the early 1960s:  What do you like about the Rolling Stones?

  Young fan:  I think the Rolling Stones have a lot more sex appeal than the Beatles.  They're so UGLY that they're appealing."

  "The Advantages of Playing Second Fiddle"

  I prefer to play second fiddle and not be in the limelight when it comes to social interactions with the opposite gender.

  Some might call it an imitation game of the person playing first fiddle.  Take my favorite band, the Rolling Stones.  They tried to claim the title of the World's Greatest Rock 'N' Roll Band but during their first two decades of existence (their only good period), they were nothing more than imitators of other bands.  Granted, they did their own kind of music with their own kind of style, but the fact remains that they were doing some heavy imitating.  In the 1960s, they presented themselves to the world as the bad-boy alternatives to the Beatles.  After the blues and early rock 'n' roll stuff of the early sixties, they began releasing pop music that was a direct imitation of the #1 band at that time, namely John, Paul, George, and Ringo.  In the 1970s, after the Beatles had broken up, they imitated everyone from the punk rockers to the glam rockers (like David Bowie) but by the end of the decade they were mainly imitating the Bee Gees.....and their results proved to be very successful for them.  All by playing second fiddle and imitating others.

  But I personally don't view playing the Second Fiddle Game as imitation.  It's just me being myself....only I avoid the limelight of head honcho....or alpha-male....or more eligible bachelor...or whatever.

  When in a crowd of single folk, I don't want to be viewed as the most eligible bachelor.  If anything, I almost want to appear as either a very masculine eunuch....or even g*y so as to not appear to be hitting on the women.  Why so?  Well, this is in large part because unless he's one of the Beatles, the mania for the world's most eligible bachelor gets old eventually.  Soon, his imperfections come out more....plus, he's just not as exciting as he once was - no one with hype ever is.  This is not a reflection on him so much as it is on the fact that ANY kind of fad gets old after a while. 

  Fads:  I remember in the early 1980s when girls were going ga-ga over Duran Duran.  Now?  They're an 80s nostalgia band.  I remember a boy band that the girls were screaming over called New Kids on the Block (whose music sucked, btw) in the late 1980s into the early 1990s.  They disappeared within three years.  (And they were never good anyway!!!!)  I remember when the TV show, Beverly Hills 90210, was so popular in the early 1990s and the actors Luke Perry and Jason Priestley ruled the hearts and hormones of every girl in America.  But where are they now?  No one knows.  I remember in the late 1990s when James van der Beek and Joshua Jackson of the TV show, Dawsons Creek were the craze.  Who gives a sh*t about them now?  No one.  I remember how women were salivating over David Duchovny in the mid-1990s at the peak of his TV show, "The X-Files."  You notice we don't hear of Duchovny anymore?  I remember 2003 when there was a stupid phenomenon called Bennifer (Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez).  Well, you KNOW what happened to that.  The same thing is gonna happen to Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton and Justin Timberlake (who are boring right now, much less in the future).

  The point being is that everything that's the current hot thing gets old eventually.  And if you're not the hottest thing around but are instead playing second fiddle....be patient because you will be....because you are the alternative that they eventually WILL consider.  And unlike the First Fiddle dude, when you play Second Fiddle there won't as far - or fast - a fall from your pinnacle....because you've already been their friend but revealed only a little of yourself at a time. Meanwhile, they know everything they could want to know about Mr. First Fiddle.

  And that is the advantage of playing second or third fiddle when in a group of guys and girls.  It sooooo pays.  'Cause if I can't be the Beatles.....I'd like to be the Rolling Stones.  If I can't be Frank Sinatra.....I'd like to be Dean Martin.  So I tell you now, while in that Second Fiddle or Third Fiddle category....revel in it! You are an alternative that will be considered once First Fiddle no longer is the "in" thing.

  P.S. It also helps if you're busy dating other people.  Somehow that adds to your appeal within a group of single women, even if they don't know you're seeing other girls.  But even though they may not know you're seeing dating other girls, they can FEEL it, they can SENSE it.  And even though they swear up and down that they don't like players.....deep down, they really do.

  PPS. The virgin girl I've been sort of seeing just said to me on the phone today, "You are usually so cold to me.  I've never been treated like that by any guy before.  And yet....I tolerate it."  Every guy she dated prior to me treated her like a queen and like she was the only one for him.  And she eventually dumped each one.  Meanwhile, she says I'm not so nice to her and constantly insinuates that I am seeing other girls.  As a result, she sometimes acts irritated and frustrated with me.  But she still sees me.

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